i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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