But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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