i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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