the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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