Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
