yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
