We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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