i think my mom watched the whole time
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize
