what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize