laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
