HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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