god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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