I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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