it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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