i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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