that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
P.S. I can't hear my feet
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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