I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
