quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize