I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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