Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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