How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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