the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize