So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
If its not for food we ain't going out.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Randomize
