can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
