If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You were trust falling into bushes
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
