This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Randomize