Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize
