I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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