In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
My balls are so social today.
it was like eating out sand paper
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
