Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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