she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
