We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize