i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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