I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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