I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
He has the fingertips of a God
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