I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
