No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
