the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize
