You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize