what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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