Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
