whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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