Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Buhtt sex?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
