There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize