He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Randomize
