So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
