Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
