I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
