I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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