ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
