How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
