have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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